Yes, this is what I feel like most of the time. It's sad. Hard as I may try, it's those damn voices. I put my fingers in my ears....lalalalalal...I can't hear you, I can't hear you.......lalalalalalal. No matter what I do, they manage to get into the deep, dark crevices of my little mind. Damn, damn it all.





I looked up, boy is that dated, rather I "googled" the word "organizing". This is what I found.

1. The act or process of organizing. (That makes sense.)

2. The state or manner of being organized. (How can you be organizing and organized?)

3. Something that has been organized or made into an ordered whole. (I'll have an order.)




Then I thought that I would simplify the search, and looked up "organize".

1. To put together into an orderly, functional, structured whole. (Hmmmm.)

2. To form into a coherent unity or functioning whole.

3. To arrange elements into a whole or interdependent parts.
(Is that the same as co-dependant??)

4. To arrange by systematic planning and united effort.

(Wouldn't united mean everybody?)

The first definition is what I feel like I'm doing now. The process of organizing. Truthfully, I can say that I'm in the process of getting my crap organized. Maybe, at this point in time, only in my mind, but that is processing.....mentally. Getting my thoughts gathered and lists made. (Remember the lists?) What needs to be done, sorted and thrown out.

When I started started this project, I didn't realize what a busy person I am. Truly. I am. It seems that I have a very busy schedule. Between my real job, my part-time job working with my mom, and all of my other home duties. Not to mentioned all the other personal jobs I want to include.....the gym, the dogs and the most important, items like pedicures and having my hair cut (and colored). After all a girl has to have some priorities.

Even with all of the things I am determined to stick with "the plan". I went to the store and bought some boxes, a matched set. I managed to get some of the items in my bathroom drawers and medicine cabinet sorted and in a functional, orderly manner. And they are pretty to boot!

All of this defining has made me realize something. Just how, amazingly unorganized I am, and how hard I try to seem organized to the outside world. My inner person - not the voices - but the other small person inside me, the one who has an epic daily battle with self-image, food, work, exercise, guilt....most things in life. You know, the shoulda, woulda, couldas of life. Everyone (I hope) has to deal with the same issues. Sometimes one just needs to put themselves first, despite the guilt and voices. By doing that it makes everything else better....they say....I think....I hope.

To continue - organizing. So far I have managed to remove Christmas from sight, clear drawers, bathroom medicine cabinet, make-up drawer and a new pantry. TA-DA!! Yes, I have a new, improved pantry. All pretty and straight. Everything in it's place and a place for everything. It's beautiful. (Never thought I would say that.) It makes me happy to open the doors and see all that's in it. I haven't been able to see "all" that's in it previously. While putting items back, strangely, I found spices that were older than my kids. And canned items that expired in 2005. Do you think that they are still good? What about all the preservatives in there? A couple of boxes almost empty cereal, crackers and chips. Why do people feel the need put things back when there is only less than a handful left? Why? What are we afraid of wasting? Going hungry? All those starving children somewhere in the world? Anyway, it done, complete (well, almost).

All in all, I think that I have fared pretty well so far. I promise that I will be more regular in posting in the future. I have more rooms, drawers, closets and cubby holes to get to. The voices won't let me rest on my laurels for very long. I have many, many miles to go before I rest and they shut up. I am off to Spokane this next weekend. It's our anniversary and we have made reservations in a very fancy place. I feel like a country bumpkin going to the big city. I will be sure to post pictures when I return. And update you on the Portland Gift Show that was last week.

Until then.