Memory Lane

I thought my task this time would be a larger one, but it ended up being a couple of smaller projects. Here goes......THE DREADED JUNK DRAWER! (This is where the scary music should be inserted.) And to be totally honest, in my case, drawers. Every kitchen has a junk drawer. The place where you toss all that you really don't know what to do with, but don't want to throw out at the moment. Take out menus, small tools, grocery coupons, assorted nails and screws, matches and whatever else is on the counter at the time that company pops in. It's the drawer that never closes without a struggle or an item falling out. The drawer that most of the time is the first place you look for some small item that you can't find. A nail to hang a picture or a magnet to secure an appointment card or something similar to the front of your refrigerator. You know the place, and don't say that you have never been there. We all have.
The first drawer was never intended to be permanent. It started out as someplace to put tools, screws and pieces of things that might be needed while we were (are) still working on the installation of our new kitchen. That's where a lot of things went at the end of the day, when we were through working and we wanted it out of sight. That way they were handier the next day to start all over again. (Why would you even think of putting them back where they belonged?) Sadly, it has grown to much more than that and also, sadly, there is still some work left to be done on the kitchen. (At least I'm not washing dishes in the utility sink anymore.)
It was time to open the drawer and face the music. No more tools in the drawer, they will be banished to the tool box where they belong and also easier to find. Imagine that. I realized, halfway through this that, by doing this it would most likely prolong the finishing of the odds and ends that still needed done, but, I was willing to take that risk for the peace of mind that it would bring to me and my voices. So I sorted and removed miscellaneous tools, nails, tapes, hammers, screwdrivers. I found "my" tools at the bottom of this mess. You know the ones that are bright pink with a floral print? Also the ones that I searched for and accused people of "borrowing". Don't laugh, doesn't everyone have dainty tools? And I thought nobody would want to use them, I was wrong.
After, what seemed like an eternity, I also started on the second drawer. Remember, two drawers. Who in their right mind would complete one before starting the other? In that drawer, I found much of the same including, batteries that I'm not sure are new or old, paper clips, rubber bands and all the informational pamphlets that come with all the kitchen appliances and smaller gadgets, vacuums, mixers, blenders, toasters, etc., etc. Some of these I'm sure that I don't even own anymore, I will know more about that when I get to the cupboards. Surprisingly, even this small task was a challenge. Keep or toss, that is the question. Hmmm.
It was like a growing process and a trip down memory lane. Deciding which of these memories are important enough to hang on to. Which ones didn't meet any of the requirements, in my mind, to make them valuable to keep? Things, such as, the cute little magnets that I picked up during vacations. Do you need the visual references to remember those times? If I toss them, when I am older and more forgetful, will I not remember? That's scary.
This is where the science project part comes into play. All of the little findings at the bottom of the drawer, pieces of this, parts of that. What is that and why in the hell did I keep it in the first place? Trying to figure out which went with what and which random parts were thrown into the bottom of the drawer just to confuse me? This is why the process takes so long. You have to stop and smile, remembering all the seemingly sane reasons that you decided to buy some of what I call crap now. Why did the muscle bound man magnet that says "Stop, step away from the refrigerator", seem so funny? Or the sparkly shiny fish? Must have been some sort of sub-conscious meaning. Fish? Water? Am I drowning? With great sorrow the man and the sparkles went in the good will box, never to grace the front of my refrigerator again. (Take a moment of silence.)
In the second drawer, I also found a mostly empty pack of cigarettes. I can't even remember how long they have been in there. In the old days, and not so along ago days, I used them when I was majorly stressed, which seems to most of the time. Them and alcohol. As I gently handle the pack, I remember how good it used to feel....to just sit....smoke....drink and ponder whatever was the stress's at the time. In my head, those three things, that sacred ritual, made me some how feel better. Also, the few, very few, people who knew of this ritual, left me completely alone. Most of the time, this was a good thing. Eventually, I tossed the partial pack in the garbage and bid them farewell. Another realization of some growth on my part. I still have stress moments, but I handle them differently now. I don't know if it is better, just different.
Amid all the sorting, wondering, tossing, cleaning and remembering I managed to get some other life things done. I did get to the gym a couple of times, I think that's good. Bought groceries. Have you ever noticed how unhappy people are at the store? I cooked dinner, twice in a row, to the shock of my husband. Worked my usual 40 hours and took a starting glance at the garage. (Reminder, need more totes.) All in all it was a constructive time off. The drawers are straight, clean and fairly empty. All of the tools are in a box in...yep, the garage. Talked with both the kids, played with the dogs, hung a couple of mirrors, shopped with my mom and glanced through a couple of new books I received. One on organizing (amazing) and one on happiness. Not that they go hand in hand, just keeping up with all of the ideas coming from the voices.
Back to work, and deciding what to organize next. Until later.